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How to Set Social Media Boundaries


Social media allows us to stay connected with friends and family, discover unknown

parts, learn new information, and express ourselves to our followers. However, during stressful situations, it can transform into a space where the noise can be overwhelming, isolating, and potentially traumatizing. In these moments, when life may feel too heavy to hold, consider setting new or different boundaries for your relationship with social media.


In the last few years, as a global society, we have experienced the Me Too movement,

the COVID-19 pandemic, the Black Lives Matter movement, the war in Ukraine, and most

recently, the war in Israel and Gaza. These events can bring up fear, confusion, and anger,

among other big feelings that can be difficult to navigate when we may be glued to our phones, digesting so much information. How do we know what is true? How do we distinguish opinions?


How do we process our own emotions in this constant flow of news? Below, I will share ways to regain control of social media usage by setting healthier boundaries instead of leaning into

habitual behaviors when you need a break.


Understand why you are on the app

When we move through life on autopilot, we may lack intention and not stay in the present. Ask yourself, why am I here? Is it to escape uncomfortable feelings? Is it to obtain new information? Am I bored? While any answer is valid, you may make a different decision if you consider what you need or want at that moment.


Instead of “doom-scrolling,” try an activity that brings you joy. Go for a walk. Take a shower. Listen to music. When you lead with intention, you are practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness allows you to be connected to your feelings and better understand yourself. It is okay to need a distraction or escape occasionally; however, are you aware when that is the motive for your actions?


More tips for setting boundaries online


Reach out to loved ones offline.

Close out of the apps. Shut down your laptop. Engage with those around you, whether it is a phone call or an in-person visit. The internet and social media are not reality. While we cannot control what is happening in the world, we can control what we choose to give our attention.


Celebrate the genuine relationships that are in your life.

This can provide perspective to macro situations compared to the micro impacting you individually. You can hold space for crisis while also being kind to yourself. We do not have a limitless amount of pain tolerance. You can walk away from something when you do not have the space to hold it. This does not mean you are not informed or do not care. Choosing to engage with those around you can be grounding and restorative. While this is always an essential part of life, it may be more impactful in times of high stress.


Check the accounts you are following

It is so simple to click “follow” or swipe through Instagram stories, yet what if these accounts no longer bring you positivity? Have you considered letting go of them to make your circle smaller?


This simple act can help remove an influx of information. You can also mute certain pages or

people during intense strife. One of the issues with social media is the consistency throughout the day for many. This flow creates a dissonance between an absorption of information and a depletion of energy. We all need to take time to recharge. It can be challenging to notice the difference here. Check-in with how you’re feeling. If a page or post brings up anger or sadness, are you moving through the emotion or past it by scrolling to the next page? By slowing down, you will be able to notice more.


Healthy social media habits


Focus on what you can control

It is normal to feel helpless witnessing tragedies, protests, or violence. Most of us want to do

something when we feel this pull. We may feel compelled to put our feelings and thoughts into words. We may share others’ words or media. While this is all within your control, what if you took that energy into bringing joy more directly into your life? Remember, we cannot control what others post or say. How much power are you putting into others’ opinions?


Social media can create a vortex of self-importance. Give yourself (and others) grace that sometimes we react without pausing to reflect on the feelings. Pause before giving in to the urge to engage in dialogue that could negatively impact you. Consider the cost and gains when engaging in social media interactions.


Do not try to control your emotions because we cannot do so. Whatever comes up, try to sit with it. This does not mean we need to overindulge in upsetting or triggering visuals. We can hold multiple things at once. Stay attuned to your body and notice your breath and heart rate. If you notice tension, lean into curiosity to better understand the source. Meditation can be a way to step away from screens and reconnect with your body and internal experience.




Our phones have become an integral part of our lives. They hold our passwords, wallets, work, and online social networks. We have lived through collective traumas, individual pain, social justice movements, and injustices, and it will likely continue. This means we must be kind to ourselves and find calm when we can. Creating healthier boundaries with social media is one thing within your control that you can change based on individual or societal circumstances.


Nothing is black and white, so remember that your boundaries may look different than others,

which is okay. Resist the urge to compare yourself to others, whether online or off. Your peace is yours alone. When it feels lost or shaken, remember that habitual behaviors may not serve you in the same way when circumstances are heightened. We all have the capacity for change.

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